Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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