I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
