You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
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