I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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