nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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