Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
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