I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
