the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Randomize