I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
