in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize
