I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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