If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
