They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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