But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
