nut hugger
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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