Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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