Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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