fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
