so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
