If that was your dad, he is hot
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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