so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
