I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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