I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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