I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Randomize