Whod you bang
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
