You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
