Texts From Last Night

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  (315): View more from New York

  evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.

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  (315): evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/zjs6
  Replies (31) Good night (911) Bad night (1543)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.

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  (208): all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem. http://tfl.nu/lmoj
  Replies (32) Good night (3465) Bad night (1466)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.

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  (775): I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;) (1-775): Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city. http://tfl.nu/zbb5
  Replies (14) Good night (4953) Bad night (825)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.

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  (617): Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar. http://tfl.nu/mo7u
  Replies (8) Good night (3726) Bad night (672)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.

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  (248): I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial. http://tfl.nu/t70i
  Replies (12) Good night (7287) Bad night (1132)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.

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  (630): He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over. http://tfl.nu/mky5
  Replies (13) Good night (1148) Bad night (6014)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.

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  (313): Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever. http://tfl.nu/w4r8
  Replies (8) Good night (1161) Bad night (3150)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.

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  (203): Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs. http://tfl.nu/c91r
  Replies (26) Good night (1094) Bad night (3110)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today

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  (712): But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today http://tfl.nu/ayt6
  Replies (4) Good night (602) Bad night (1387)
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  (409): View more from Texas

  It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true

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  (409): It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true http://tfl.nu/wq1h
  Replies (9) Good night (1050) Bad night (1498)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.

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  (330): My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story. http://tfl.nu/g1cp
  Replies (6) Good night (1188) Bad night (552)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.

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  (512): We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents. http://tfl.nu/1dqy
  Replies (10) Good night (1693) Bad night (486)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.

  (1-410): View more from Maryland

  Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here

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  (443): They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing. (1-410): Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here http://tfl.nu/0wca
  Replies (7) Good night (1435) Bad night (507)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.

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  (306): it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do. http://tfl.nu/dtwv
  Replies (3) Good night (638) Bad night (434)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best

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  (503): I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best http://tfl.nu/0r3u
  Replies (3) Good night (529) Bad night (232)

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