Fuck appropriateness.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Boobs are out for the taking
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
