Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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