I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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