the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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