what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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