I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Randomize
