Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Randomize
