I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
