Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
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