My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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