ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
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