So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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