I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
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