i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
do herpes really smell.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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