Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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