i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I love you. Go after that dick
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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