I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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