i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Randomize