I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
