dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
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I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
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He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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