I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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