so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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