Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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