Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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